Brokenness Births Purpose
Brokenness. Not a fun word. If you’ve been through a time of the soul’s grieving, you know the pain can be intense. It’s something we all share in common in the human experience. Life can be hard. I find that God wants to teach us in each season we encounter- whether we find ourselves on a mountaintop or in the valley. Only, we must avoid the temptation to escape the painful low places. To do so is to abort the fullness of effectual change that the Lord can birth through us in those opportune moments. So when the challenge comes (not if), let us hold on to Jesus and see the purpose of heaven manifest while we depend on His deliverance. He is the Healer and Redeemer, and we can trust Him to bring revelation in due time.
My pastor, Jim Rodriguez, says brokenness is the Lord’s tool for producing multiplication. And it’s no wonder. We are at our ripest place of understanding how much we need God when we are broken. It is then that He can work exponentially through us. “God cannot use me to full capacity unless I am broken,” Pastor Jim shares.
Spring 2009. I was on my kitchen floor and crying out to God for forgiveness for our waywardness as a nation. I was grieved, and only the Holy Spirit led me into a posture of repentance and desperate intercession for my beloved country. We increasingly turn away from the God who graced us in Jesus to live with Him eternally. How far we have strayed from our faithful beginning as a people who call upon the name of the Lord.
After that time of prayer, I didn’t know what God was doing in my heart, but I knew that He had moved me. Six months later, I received a strong leading of the Holy Spirit to enter into a local school board election. Such a move was way beyond my comfort zone, and I wanted the call to be erased. I was not initially faithful; the notion simply did not make sense to me. God radically confirmed it, and at that point I sensed to walk away would be an act of disobedience. The next eight months were life- altering! I am not the same person I was prior to the 2010 School Board Campaign. Living throughout that time span as one who was skinned alive and vulnerable to any and everyone’s hit put me in a desperate place. I came to know God in a greater way- He shields the one who is exposed. He speaks and inspires. He sends comfort in timely ways. He shows the intricacy of our unity as the Body of Christ. His Word leads us clearly. His Spirit empowers us to move when our physical strength is sapped.
You would think that if Peter actually stepped out of the boat and on the water with Jesus that he would have walked all the way to shore with Him. He didn’t. He sank and cried out to Jesus. In the same way, my expectation to win the school board race did not come to fruition. But God was working. He had me alert now. The family-based platform that I campaigned with took a new turn. The family in America needs healing and marriages are the starting place. Soon after the campaign season ended, I was called upon to help a friend whose marriage was in crisis. We met together and believed God for a turn-around. Our joy of discovering His faithfulness to them in that season led us to a joint project of writing about marriage.
Six months later, the friend expressed her release from the work on the book, and I was faced with a decision: “Lord, do you want this book to come forth from me?” I asked. He made His yes clear. The realities of broken marriages brought horrific tragedies before my eyes during three weeks of fasting and seeking His perfect will. I was bombarded by evidence of how dire the need was for revelation. God spoke through these heart-breaking circumstances and said, “This is not just a good idea; this is life and death.” Truly it was…
I went to work and quickly finished The Love Triangle: What Every Couple Needs for a Successful Marriage. Once published, the book opened the door for my husband and me to speak at retreats, conferences and church services. While we continue to give our yes to God and serve the Body of Christ through encouragement for their marriages, we also seek to build up those who are not connected to a community of faith. In the past year, Jon and I have been asked to get certification for becoming marriage specialists. We went through the training and have begun to serve couples in crisis. I also work a marriage hotline that grants me access to those who otherwise are not getting any spiritual guidance on how to honor their spouse in marriage. God is moving mightily during those calls.
It’s been seven years since that time in prayer in which I wept over America. I agree with all who say it- If God breaks your heart for something, you can believe He has a purpose for it. Where we are today is nothing that we could have foreseen, and I believe we are merely scratching the surface. God has so much more if only we will live dependently upon Him every day. Through such a lifestyle, we lead others to the same, glorious dependence upon the God who is faithful.